August 13, 2015 - MTC

Dear Family and Friends,

There comes a point in the MTC after almost two months of being here, that you just have felt too tired and or sad to continue on. The beginning of this week I felt like I God was not with me. I felt homesick and exhausted. 

We are taught our whole lives that if we ask God, He will answer our prayers. I think I have done a lot of asking but almost never listened for the answer to my prayers. We were at the temple and I pleaded with my Heavenly Father to answer my prayers and help me know that he was with me and helping me along this journey. 

I now need to give a little back story. The weather has been the same here almost everyday. You start to feel like the days never change, all I wanted was for it to rain. The next day after my prayer It rained all day! However I still doubted, I took it for chance or luck. I continued to ask for confirmation that He was with me. A teacher that I have never talked to before in my life while at the MTC called me out of class to talk with me. Completely confused I went with her. She proceeded to talk to me about how she felt like she needed to speak with me and see how I was doing. She promised me that when we spoke she felt the spirit and she knew that I had a gift from God to understand others and uplift them... I thought that she had it all backwards, she had the gift from God to help others and uplift me when I was down. 

I continued to feel like I had not received an answer... The days were still just as hard. 

I was sitting at dinner and I asked heavenly father If I could please see a friend that I had not seen in a long time, because this certain friend has a gift for making people feel better. I looked all of dinner for him and nothing. As I left with my companion out of the cafeteria there was my friend walking right toward me. He had is arms wide open and said "Elder Erwin, I have missed you so much!"

Finally I had a friend who departed today and she pulled me aside before she left and told me that she had been praying for me... and felt like she needed to help me know that I am on the right path and that she could feel God's love for me. 

Like my friends arms who were wide open to embrace me when I needed them, The Saviors arms are also wide open. Never in my life have I asked and then realized how quickly God will put forth his mercy for us. I am witness to miracles. I felt as if I could not walk anymore and so He blessed me with the exact things I needed to continue on. I feel so grateful to be a witness of these miracles and be apart of this gospel! 

Only 14 more days till I leave the MTC!

Love Elder Erwin 文長老